Industry or environment?
Money or sustainability?
War or Peace?
Money or sustainability?
War or Peace?
Ok well, let's go back just a little bit. Today was a typical day in Chicago. What is a typical day in Chicago you ask? Ah, great question indeed! Well to start off, generally, one wakes up in a cold room. The next thing is that one takes a lukewarm shower and then maybe drinks some day old cold coffee. If you're lucky, you'll catch the train right on time! But that typically doesn't happen. But if you're even luckier than usual, you have a good job to go to on a day to day basis.
So anyways, the first thing I heard about in the headlines is "Chicago Public School Board President Found Dead in the Chicago River". Can you believe it?! A gun shot to the head,. and the police have labeled it a suicide. I'm listening to the news and the major developments of the day are apparently still about censorship in China. I figured that we were over that by now. Sigh,. What's this? Eagle Town, Colorado?! Sounds like the perfect American city! Or perhaps, Liberty, Missouri. Hm, sounds intising.
So today all I could think about was posterity. It's really quite curious if you ask me, that before I even apply for a job, I have visions of myself after a year, after two years, perhaps after a decade from working a job that I am unsure that I will even get! But isn't that why we hold imagination to such great esteem? No? At this point, I have come to terms that the whole conception of "the home" is an imaginary one - and no, not one that is a fun delusion. Well, actually there are some things to look forward to.
For example, when I come "home" from work, I am very excited at the prospects of:
So anyways, the first thing I heard about in the headlines is "Chicago Public School Board President Found Dead in the Chicago River". Can you believe it?! A gun shot to the head,. and the police have labeled it a suicide. I'm listening to the news and the major developments of the day are apparently still about censorship in China. I figured that we were over that by now. Sigh,. What's this? Eagle Town, Colorado?! Sounds like the perfect American city! Or perhaps, Liberty, Missouri. Hm, sounds intising.
So today all I could think about was posterity. It's really quite curious if you ask me, that before I even apply for a job, I have visions of myself after a year, after two years, perhaps after a decade from working a job that I am unsure that I will even get! But isn't that why we hold imagination to such great esteem? No? At this point, I have come to terms that the whole conception of "the home" is an imaginary one - and no, not one that is a fun delusion. Well, actually there are some things to look forward to.
For example, when I come "home" from work, I am very excited at the prospects of:
1. Petting my cat
2. Taking a nap
3. Eating an avocado
4. Screaming at the news
2. Taking a nap
3. Eating an avocado
4. Screaming at the news
I've come to terms with my reality at this point.
And I'm sitting here in this room I've made for myself. It's actually quite nice and my cat finally smells good. I gave him a bath (which he protested the whole way through) and he smells like shampoo. Also, I have every guitar I've ever owned in my direct presence. I always felt a connection with songwriters because it's such a difficult thing to really write something honest for yourself. But of course, whenever when you do, people want to know what it's about, or who it's about. And sometimes it can be hard to give people the answer to certain questions you can't even answer for yourself.
Well I have pretty vivid dreams almost every night. And when I do finally wake up, it's always the same. At first I am so awestruck with what has happened in my other life (you ever have dreams that feel so real?) We spend half of our existence asleep and the other half in front of a monitor of some sort. Then I realize that I need to get up and wash my body so that I'm presentable for the rest of the world to see. Hell,. who am I to complain? Really. I mean, I've had such a cushy, cozy life for the most part. It's one my grandfather probably would have killed a few Nazis to have himself! Honest! He thinks it's pretty ironic that I have a college degree. I was helping him fix a fence one time, and when I took the hammer and gave it a swing to pound this staple into the fence post, the thing went flying (the staple that is). He had a pretty good chuckle and said, "Now what we got here is a boy that has a college degree but don't know much about how to use a hammer!". I thought it was pretty funny too but also pitiful. I realized that the "city boy" just refers to an overly domesticated breed of person.
And I'm sitting here in this room I've made for myself. It's actually quite nice and my cat finally smells good. I gave him a bath (which he protested the whole way through) and he smells like shampoo. Also, I have every guitar I've ever owned in my direct presence. I always felt a connection with songwriters because it's such a difficult thing to really write something honest for yourself. But of course, whenever when you do, people want to know what it's about, or who it's about. And sometimes it can be hard to give people the answer to certain questions you can't even answer for yourself.
Well I have pretty vivid dreams almost every night. And when I do finally wake up, it's always the same. At first I am so awestruck with what has happened in my other life (you ever have dreams that feel so real?) We spend half of our existence asleep and the other half in front of a monitor of some sort. Then I realize that I need to get up and wash my body so that I'm presentable for the rest of the world to see. Hell,. who am I to complain? Really. I mean, I've had such a cushy, cozy life for the most part. It's one my grandfather probably would have killed a few Nazis to have himself! Honest! He thinks it's pretty ironic that I have a college degree. I was helping him fix a fence one time, and when I took the hammer and gave it a swing to pound this staple into the fence post, the thing went flying (the staple that is). He had a pretty good chuckle and said, "Now what we got here is a boy that has a college degree but don't know much about how to use a hammer!". I thought it was pretty funny too but also pitiful. I realized that the "city boy" just refers to an overly domesticated breed of person.
_____________
Last week I had a very interesting experience almost every day. But the week before that, I had even more interesting experiences. I went to the Chicago Cultural Center and saw some Euro-jazz bands. But for me, the more exciting part was the building itself. It was great to be somewhere that made you feel a part of society. I felt like I was in a movie at some points, the doors were that absurdly large. But this place made it feel like, "Wow, so this is what my culture looks like on paper". And so that night I treated myself to a Portillo's Polish Sausage, and it was good.
I had lunch the other week with a dear friend who enlisted himself into the Navy with a college degree and has made it through basic training. He looked very different. We have been good friends for a long time. However, it was one of those moments where I saw a different person immediately. It was good. I'm glad we're all realizing that it's time to move on.
I created an adage the other day that I'm kind of proud of. It goes like this. "The ones who loved you are always the ones who are ready to twist the knife once you've placed it in your own back". It's true because, how could you blame them? It seems like such a worthwhile thing to get retribution.
A pretty good way to avoid all confrontation is to find a new hobby that consumes you - like collecting junky stuff. But people can still get mad at you for doing this. Yes, it's true. But they're missing the point. Because it's not really all about "you". Quite the contrary.
But sometimes I can also get too caught up escaping to better times. Sometimes I think about living in Aiken, South Carolina at a ripe age surrounded by woods in a nice house and a dog named Cocoa. She was a Boykin Spaniel, the state dog of South Carolina actually. It was pretty easy to be happy in those days. I had a really simple interest in life, and it was to learn about the things I loved: dinosaurs, cowboys, squirrels, etc. Interests do change over time. That's definitely true, but it's also nice to return to simpler things.
I also find myself wondering - what kind of love is worth fighting for? You shouldn't have to fight something that you love right? Unfortunately, it is easier to just tune out and give up on things. I think it's something that Darwin understood. He clearly understood the paradoxal things in this world. Complacency with contempt.
There are still a few mysteries left in the universe. I say, let the universe be mysterious but allow yourself to be open with others. Why the hell not? What are you going to lose? When you have nothing left to gain, you finally come to terms with yourself as a small piece of the whole of all organic existence (until the Large Hedron Collider discovers dark matter and then there will be nothing left to discover). So in the meanwhile, I think we should all try to sleep well. It's the only time that you have to really be free.
I had lunch the other week with a dear friend who enlisted himself into the Navy with a college degree and has made it through basic training. He looked very different. We have been good friends for a long time. However, it was one of those moments where I saw a different person immediately. It was good. I'm glad we're all realizing that it's time to move on.
I created an adage the other day that I'm kind of proud of. It goes like this. "The ones who loved you are always the ones who are ready to twist the knife once you've placed it in your own back". It's true because, how could you blame them? It seems like such a worthwhile thing to get retribution.
A pretty good way to avoid all confrontation is to find a new hobby that consumes you - like collecting junky stuff. But people can still get mad at you for doing this. Yes, it's true. But they're missing the point. Because it's not really all about "you". Quite the contrary.
But sometimes I can also get too caught up escaping to better times. Sometimes I think about living in Aiken, South Carolina at a ripe age surrounded by woods in a nice house and a dog named Cocoa. She was a Boykin Spaniel, the state dog of South Carolina actually. It was pretty easy to be happy in those days. I had a really simple interest in life, and it was to learn about the things I loved: dinosaurs, cowboys, squirrels, etc. Interests do change over time. That's definitely true, but it's also nice to return to simpler things.
I also find myself wondering - what kind of love is worth fighting for? You shouldn't have to fight something that you love right? Unfortunately, it is easier to just tune out and give up on things. I think it's something that Darwin understood. He clearly understood the paradoxal things in this world. Complacency with contempt.
There are still a few mysteries left in the universe. I say, let the universe be mysterious but allow yourself to be open with others. Why the hell not? What are you going to lose? When you have nothing left to gain, you finally come to terms with yourself as a small piece of the whole of all organic existence (until the Large Hedron Collider discovers dark matter and then there will be nothing left to discover). So in the meanwhile, I think we should all try to sleep well. It's the only time that you have to really be free.
Or as I.G. Good once stated,
"The first ultra-intelligent machine is the last invention that man need ever make."
Good night.
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